'Procrastinate' -- a dreaded and much-maligned word. But why? Its dichotomy is straightforward enough: 'pro', the Latin word meaning 'for', and 'cras', the Latin word meaning 'tomorrow'. For tomorrow. As interpreted by some, that is a tired excuse of feckless idlers -- but I hear in it the rallying cry of sanguine see-ers. A call to those who fix their vision beyond the drooping certainties of the present and instead root for the limitless contingencies of the future. For tomorrow! With pride, I take it upon myself to defend unrealized epiphanies; to imagine quixotic possibility -- even when it may be more practical to do. For all great things which have yet to be exist in a day still to come. Today may be a gift, but tomorrow holds unadulterated promise.*
*Finals? I'll get to those later. . .
I like Christmas music. a lot. So I kind of maybe started listening to it on November 1st this year....I know what you're thinking, but don't worry! I didn't start all at once. I knew Five would be opposed to the idea of Christmas carols before Turkey Day, so instead of blaring jingle-tastic tunes continuously, I performed a form of inception on her. By intermingling her favorite music with my favorite Christmas songs, I allowed her to think the Christmas music was normal music. This incremental introduction to holiday cheer worked. She didn't notice. at. all. At least for a little while. Like maybe one day. But this one day allowed me to prepare my defense--a strategy for convincing her that everything was OK. After explaining that though there may be some pretty spooky Halloween music, the Thanksgiving music department was generally lacking she graciously allowed me to continue listening.
Now that normal people have started listening to holiday music, I can finally share my newest discovery. You all know how much we love these timeless tunes, but I think I've found another favorite.
"The Cowboy's Christmas Ball" by the Killers combines all things magical and marvelous (Cowboys+ Christmas+Balls...Umm, ooh. Erm. Well, yeah. You know what I mean).
Anyway, it's amazing.
I'm in love.
Enjoy!
Now that normal people have started listening to holiday music, I can finally share my newest discovery. You all know how much we love these timeless tunes, but I think I've found another favorite.
"The Cowboy's Christmas Ball" by the Killers combines all things magical and marvelous (Cowboys+ Christmas+Balls...Umm, ooh. Erm. Well, yeah. You know what I mean).
Anyway, it's amazing.
I'm in love.
Enjoy!
Remember when I said you should do something illegal in college?
done.
and.
done.
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| Identities have been concealed to protect the innocent |
You know what they say? First comes love, then comes baby, then the momma becomes a married lady! Wait... no... that's not quite right.
Anyway... Mr. Two and I are trying to decide which wedding announcement we are going to send out. During my search, I found this little book which I find--what's the word--inspiring. I think you all will find the jacket material quite illuminating:
"Had enough of the same old wedding announcements? The thick paper, printing press, the vellum and worst of all, the antiquated language? In my new book, Wedding Announcements for People In Love, you will find ideas for wedding announcements that are totally original and speak to what each bride or groom really wants to tell people about their wedding. Let us help you find the perfect message to share with all of your loved ones about your special day."
I'm pretty sure she's a genius.
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| It says, "We just want you to know, we weren't pregnant." |
Remember that one time your friend convinced herself that an assortment of weird symptoms vaguely resembling pregnancy were a result of stress? Because she kept taking pregnancy tests and they kept coming back negative? But then it turned out that she had bought an entire industrial-sized box of faulty tests and SHE HAD REALLY BEEN PREGNANT THAT WHOLE TIME?
No?
Well, it's a girl.
After a whirlwind week that started with feeling a baby kick and confessing to my husband that I must really be having some sort of psychotic break, which prompted a positive pregnancy test (from a different box -- I will let you know the offending brand in question when I get back to D.C.!), a visit to a doctor who thought I probably was crazy -- until he turned on the ultrasound and saw Little Miss in all her 22 weeks of gestational glory -- and then quality time with some of the best prenatal specialists in the Rocky Mountain region, I am really, really happy to say that everything looks perfectly great. And she's due April 15. Which feels awfully soon, doesn't it? What a crazy/weird/thrilling blessing!
So, for all those of you who've been thinking (SINCE JULY) that I've been unusually emotional, needy, worn out, emotional, fat, emotional and glowing, (let's PLEASE not forget glowing!), sorry about that. But apparently there's been a pretty good reason. Happy Tax Day!
No?
Well, it's a girl.
After a whirlwind week that started with feeling a baby kick and confessing to my husband that I must really be having some sort of psychotic break, which prompted a positive pregnancy test (from a different box -- I will let you know the offending brand in question when I get back to D.C.!), a visit to a doctor who thought I probably was crazy -- until he turned on the ultrasound and saw Little Miss in all her 22 weeks of gestational glory -- and then quality time with some of the best prenatal specialists in the Rocky Mountain region, I am really, really happy to say that everything looks perfectly great. And she's due April 15. Which feels awfully soon, doesn't it? What a crazy/weird/thrilling blessing!
So, for all those of you who've been thinking (SINCE JULY) that I've been unusually emotional, needy, worn out, emotional, fat, emotional and glowing, (let's PLEASE not forget glowing!), sorry about that. But apparently there's been a pretty good reason. Happy Tax Day!
Now, I realize that some of you may have gotten confused by the title, so I guess I'll just have to do two tutorials.
Twotorials. Heh. Heh heh.
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Here's the first one (scroll down while shutting your eyes if you want to skip to the next one):
How to Make a Great Profile Picture:
Worried about first-impressions on the social networking site of your choice? Nervous about appearing unhip or square? Throw those cares away and have no fear!!! After extensively researching some of the most current cats† on the web, I've compiled this list of few foolproof tips for a profile picture guaranteed to enchant both friends and potential friends!
†by cats, I mean 12-18 year old girls. Not actual cats (though those can work too, if you go the meme route).
1) Take the picture yourself (no trípode permite)
Whether it be alone or with a friend, using a point-and-shoot or a webcam, nothing beats the "look at how far my arm stretches!" vibe of a self-portrait.
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| As is 'totes obvi' in this 'pic', the foreshortening created by arm extension towards the camera is very flattering. |
2) Work those labios!
Few things scuh-reeem 'attractive' louder than pouty lips. One of those few things are duck lips. Make them in every picture.
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| Always apologize for poor or strange lighting. Your friends will appreciate it. |
3) Alterar las imágenes (tal vez añadiendo una palabra coqueta o dos)
Things automatically look keener when they're washed out and have some neat black flowers around the rim!
4) Strike the same pose repeatedly in front of a (preferably bathroom) mirror
Consistency is key here! No one likes being confronted with a new bathroom-mirror pose mid-browsing!
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| Fit as much of your great body into this type of 'pic' as possible. Don't worry about obscuring your face -- that's not what people'll be focusing on! |
5) Combine the tips!!!
All of these ideas are great in isolation, but they're super H-O-T. . .-T when you mix them all together!
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| What a picture. What. A. Picture. |
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Now for tutorial #2!!!
(or, as I call them to further my own, incredibly strange and pointless ends, Profile Pictures)
1) Take a picture of the side of someone's face
2) Lightly trace its outline, using your computer screen as a lightboard*
3) Cut it out (difficult at times, but doable), and secure to a canvas
4) Paint with paint (I used black acrylic, you could use fuchsia nail polish. No judgment here.)
5) Carefully remove the top sheet and enjoy the beauteous fruits of your labor
You can do lots of exciting stuff with these -- different colors, different background colors, different canvas shapes. Lots of possibilities. I explored almost none of them.
*Try not to puncture/otherwise damage it, though. That's why I stipulated that you draw lightly.